what was i thinking ?

Okay theres this kid that i like but wtf was i thinking, its never going to happen, he's like so much better than me, he's soo popular and good looking and nice. those people just kinda seem to like make me smilee alot but why cant i ever have them. gutted really, lol i just want someone to make me feel special like i belong someone who can take my wierdness :S Grr. im so angry at myself i seem to do everything wrong even this blog is wrong i cant even spell why am i even telling you this no ones going to read it!

Okay ive got several addictions at the moment, like skins :D and

This new band called Elephants i'm fully in love with the band singer. I love my ipod and my jack wills hoodie and i love people smiling :D.

I think my first blog was saying that i'm really depressing, which i'm not well i can be but most of the time i try and smile and hide all the negative thoughts inside my head. I like making people happy, i dont care about me and how my life is going i just love to see my friends smile :D.

I don't know whether its just me, but does love always make you think?

It makes me think an awful lot i think about whether they only want me to do stuff, whether they do actually like me and what do they see in me ?:L I know it sounds crazy and urm.. Just like weird, i think alot about like how i look and what people think about me, its quite annoying 'coz it stops me form doing things i like. Its like i feel everyone has an opinion what i do and what i think is like they are always disappointed in me or they underestimate and ive got my mind fixed that people only like me 'coz they fell sorry for me :S and they only pay me compliments to make me feel better it's sad, i am sad but its how i think. its quite worrying really i am a worrier :/ i hate the way i act i act way too loud and way to happy, people get annoyed with me it kinda of gets me really depressed :L.

Ahaaa thats how i fell about love and me :L

If you read this sorry :S:L x